Is your relationship affecting your fitness goals? There’s an argument for single vs. committed. If your single, some might say you have time to focus on your goals and want to be in shape for dating. If you’re in a relationship, is it easier to grow comfortable and let your fitness goals go? Or, does the stability of a relationship allow us to focus on the gym?
Does your significant other support your fitness goals? And does this support or lack of it, make a difference? Which side of the argument are you on?
In spirit of this topic, I thought I'd share a picture of me and my husband Billy.
I think for those serious about fitness, relationship status is completely irrelevant, because when you are doing it for yourself, you can be single or attached. For both, being single or attached has pros and cons for fitness. Sometimes partners, or any other loved one, can inadvertantly sabotage our efforts, but that's where being strong, steadfast, and committed to yourself comes in. Btw, love the pic, Kim!!
ReplyDeleteSuch a gorgeous picture.... first of all.
ReplyDeleteI agree with Shelley regarding that we do fitness for ourselves. I will say though, having been through the rigors of competing and modeling with both an unsupportive husband AND a supportive husband that it really does make a difference to have that support. It spills over so much into our day-to-day life, and I'm not always so strong - if my husband didn't care about my fitness goals and ordered pizza every night I'd be in trouble!! :)
It CAN be done no matter what - complete support system or no support whatsoever - BUT it is a whole new set of challenges if you have to do it completely alone.
In my situation my husband has helped push me to become serious about fitness just like he is. He always used to be the one choosing to go to the gym, and the salad instead of the pizza. He has helped me to become better and I am so much more happy with my new (ish) healthy lifestyle.
ReplyDeleteI have friends with less than supportive spouses and they will order pizza or make cookies and it seems like they are threatened by their wives new commitment to themselves. I think finding balance is the key for anyone and everyone. And as women, realizing that we are worth the time it takes to maintain healthy eating and healthy exercise is a BIG deal! We are a lot of times more worried about taking care of anyone, and everyone else!
Love the blog! and your wedding picture is gorgeous!
Dear Kim:
ReplyDeleteIf the relationship is truly a team effort, then the entire family is on board to live a healthy and fit lifestyle. The biggest variable in that statement is the IF part. For this reason I believe that each of us has our own challenges in balancing our fitness lifestyles, relationships, work, family and all the other variables in our lives.
As you know, it takes a team to keep everyone in the family centered and motivated. Especially if you are in a relationship with children. It also takes a tremendous amount of communication, trust and ongoing commitment. If each member of the team is aligned, then all will go smoothly.
The working out portion of fitness is tough, but the nutrition and adequate rest balance is even harder. Again, with the team thought process, I truly believe that fitness can be an added dimension to the relationship, rather than a threat.
The saying goes "ain't no one happy if mama ain't happy" really holds true. I am so much happier making headway on my fitness goals. After working out, I am calmer, feel stronger to handle the ups and downs of my daily hectic life and can stay more focused on the task at hand. I am also more productive at work because of my ability to focus. The added strength and confidence flows back to my family, work and education.
To close, I want to express how important it is to have that time to give yourself to work hard towards reaching your fitness goals, because that "selfish" time will flow back to you in benefits that you can't even imagine. And, why does it have to be considered "selfish" time, anyways? Is it termed "selfish" time when husbands and fathers go and do their thing?
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ReplyDeleteGreat topic. I find that often in relationships, one person can sometimes become insecure with themselves because of the other partner is wanting to live fit and healthy, and they just aren't to that point yet or don't want to. This often t...imes can lead to insecurities etc within the relationship with the fear of them not being good enough. The one thing that each person need to realize is that no matter who you married/seeing, you chose to love them for them, not because of how fit they were at the time. I saw this one day and it made a lot of sense "I prefer wit over fit." Obviously we want our partner to remain healthy and live long so as long as they are doing that, we should remember to encourage them that during our own progress they are loved no differently. This will only encourage them to return the support and love to what you are wanting as well.
ReplyDeleteMy husband gives me the encouragement I need to get out the door sometimes. The reassurance that he will feed the kids/ do bedtime/ finish the laundry while I get to the gym helps me to achieve my goals. I used to be able to go to the gym w/ the kids, but they've been too sickly this winter to come w/ me & infect the gym nursery!
ReplyDeleteI would say that CHILDREN, not spouses, are the biggest potential fitness de-railer that there is. They just are. They get sick, you have to take care of them. Or worse, you get sick from all their preschool germs. Sleepless nights and even if you have a supportive spouse, if you're breastfeeding, there's not a whole lot daddy can do at 2 am. If you don't have means for childcare, you're in trouble and you have to come up with some innovative solutions.
Right now I'm struggling with having no libido. I started seriously working out 5 times a week about a month ago and I think it's having the opposite effect on me. I'm sure this is causing much strain in our marriage, but I don't know what to do about it.
ReplyDeleteI thought working out and eating clean should make me feel sexy and alive. Maybe I'm over doing it.
He wants to workout together everyday, while I want to hit the gym by myself. I feel like I'm sabotaging the support I get from him, cuz it breaks his heart knowing I don't want to workout with him.
Hopefully I'll get this figured out, but I don't want it to stop me from becoming the strong and super healthy person that I want so badly to become.
Thanks for listening.
xoxo
Roxie-Girl
First of all Thank you for the feedback. I'm so inspired by the honesty. In our willingness to share, we help each other feel like we're not the only one going through it! Children are a fitness de-railer for sure. Marriages and even friendships can make or break our day, but in the end we make our choices. Sounds like we're all doing the best we can! I love the comment "If Mom's not happy, no one is" because we greatly set the tone for our homes.
ReplyDeleteThank you for supporting the Yummy Mummy Blog, it means the world to me.
Yours in health,
Kim
Loving this blog and the comments from other'mamas' thought I was the only one struggling sometimes to get it going with the kids in tow! Glad we are all in this together, this is my daily blog that inspires me to keep going so thank you.
ReplyDeleteNatasha
Thank you so much Natasha Jane for supporting the blog!Glad to hear you're getting something out of it. And, no you're not the only one:)
ReplyDelete